politics politics

Got caught within some office conflict today. :| I am assisting in project management and usually the tasks that we (the management team who work with the bank) have to do are not 'popular', in a sense. The company requires some updating of documents that the bigwigs up there requested which makes no sense on the ground because the contents worked on are always changing. Well, I was tasked to get the updates from the various people working on different aspects of the project and some of them were uncooperative, dismissing the updating of documents as completely unnecessary. There was a couple of fiery emails exchanged, with me as a "cc:" party, since I was sort of involved in this (even tho' I was just doing what I was asked). The unhappy dude typed in caps and sounded really pissed over the email. He typed in CAPS! Some way to express his view huh. Some of the issues raised by him seemed quite valid but again, what do I know. This is only my 2nd week into the job and I know nuts about what they've been working on, other than the superficial knowledge that it has something to do with IT. Sigh. I hate being the middle party who has to relay messages. The middle party usually has to bear the shit that happens when there are any 'misquotes' involved (which is why everything should be written in black and white). One party could just turned around and deny whatever he or she had said.

I met my boss for lunch yesterday. He came back from his leave and treated me to lunch while finding out how my first week went. He's a nice guy lah...but I still don't quite believe everything he says. My boss is actually quite big, in terms of rank, so it is an advantage that I am directly hired under his name...but fact is, I still don't know him very well. He shared with me some information that placed many thoughts and doubts into my head. Apparently the Swiss lady I am working under now felt threatened when she realised that an assistant was about to be hired while she was about to go on leave. She was worried that the assistant (aka my role) would replace her. I asked my boss how did he know and whether the Swiss lady actually shared this with him. He said he could tell from her body language. (Who knows what my boss sees through MY body language. Damn scary!) Hmm. I don't know how much of this I should believe but surely, my view of the Swiss lady has changed. Yes, she is still nice...but I don't know if this is only on the surface since according to my boss, it wasn't all that long ago when she rose to become deputy project manager and felt threatened by the hiring of a project assistant. The Swiss lady is young and "eager to learn". I got info that she is around my age also, maybe slightly older, basically she is someone still trying to carve out a career. Anyway, my boss shared a lot of stuff. He told me straight that he is a very straight-forward person and would say it as it is, as long things get moving. Received a few more information on the company's dysfunctional culture. I shared with him a little about what I've been doing and he expressed surprise that I was only given excel sheets to update. He even gave a comment that they might be under-utilising me and suggested that if I feel like I have nothing to learn or do, I can contact him straight to tell him. My face went like..."ehhh." He could tell that I was hesitant because any smart employee should know better than to jump above your direct supervisor straight to the head to, in a sense, 'complain' about matters, so he assured me that "nobody has to know." He told me to see how this week goes and if I feel my time is not used productively, I could just tell him and he would give me things to do without anyone having to know about my feedback.

Of 'cos a part of me really want to do more and to learn more so that my 5 months there will be of value but I have to be very wise in the way I get around to doing it. I mean, I have stuff to do now (more or less) like creating and updating excel sheets but they are damn boring tasks and I hardly learn anything new. Initially I thought this was all there is to this job and this is exactly how the job is supposed to be like so I wanted to rough it out for the next few months and move on from there; but now my boss made me believe that there is much more I can learn from the job and...I don't know. A few suspicions entered my head. Could the Swiss lady be deliberately giving me simple, tedious, and mundane tasks to do because she doesn't want me to learn? Or could this be a test of character from my boss to see if I would, in a way, 打小报告 and report straight to him? 'Cos if I hadn't noticed wrongly, my boss works pretty closely with the Swiss guy who is the Swiss lady's boss. Or could it really be my boss's good intentions- his wanting me to make the best of my time there? Am I thinking too much (again?)? Right now, I'm taking everyone's words with a pinch of salt but there are a few choices I have to make. Do I feedback to the boss and get him to give me more productive work (an assumption)? Or do I stick with the current situation and try to learn as much as I could from it? Bleah. This requires smart PR skills! How do I get things done to my advantage without offending others? Hmm. I'll be praying about it of 'cos and just observe a bit on how things work out for me. This is only my 2nd week after all so I will give it some time. It's not my habit to make hasty decisions.

Btw, no one in my office knows I had lunch with my boss and I don't intend to inform this fact with anyone either. It is very important to be aware of your surroundings and protect yourself from any 小人。 不要被吃了都不知道。

I hate politics. I can think politics, try to read their 'signs', feel their 'vibes', or even analyse them but I hate being involved in them. This is why I love keeping low profile. Just leave me alone! Man, I am only doing a contract assignment. Don't know why I'm involved in this crap also. I might be thinking too much tho'. 现在我还是以平常心工作但我的警觉性已提高。 听了那么是非，当然要更小心行事。这将会是我步入社会的一个很好的经验。熟话说： 知人知面不知心， 大家要小心！哈哈~

I admit I don't trust people easily. It's not that I have a problem trusting people 'cos there are many people I trust but these people gained my trust over the years. Now I'm thrown in a situation where I have to work with a bunch of people I hardly know...of 'cos it is natural to have some suspicions and doubts on their characters and what not. Actually it doesn't really matter 'cos I'm just a small fry and no one would really bother to "kill me off." I have nothing to fear also 'cos I'm only on contract. How should I say...hmm. I'm just observing lor. Haha, what I would gain most from this work stint? Probably the interpersonal skills that I so badly want to improve on, or perhaps, to be more alert and wise in my dealings with others. This is all good. Work = money and socialisation. This will prepare me for my next job. Yeah! That being said, I think the Swiss lady, Ms S, is nice. I'm just gonna believe that she is nice and treat her nice too. :) As for how should I take my step...? Let God lead the way.