Didn't sleep

In the end I didn't sleep. The sleepiness just kinda disappeared. I tend to emo a lot when there are a lot of uncertainties in my life and I'm confused about things. There is a also tendency for my moods to fluctuate with the circumstances in my life, which really suck crap 'cos how we feel internally about ourselves shouldn't be determined by changes in our external environment (which changes all the time, btw). To see this positively, it's good that I feel angry because nothing should have the power to dictate my mood like that and anger is the first step to change. I should decide how I want to feel! Anyway, I'm feeling better now. :)

I'm called down for another interview @ the Japanese bank, another dept. Didn't get the job that I previously interviewed for (the one I didn't prepare), which may not be such a bad thing because I thought the JD seemed a little crappy. In a way, I'm relieved I didn't get the job, but then there is that pressure to find a job- any job- 'cos I need and want the money, so I probably wouldn't mind doing crappy stuff either. Does it sound sad? I'm sure there are many people like me, or at least, with thoughts like mine. Sigh.

Okay. POSITIVE POSITIVE!

Let's move on to something else. Something happy.

NODAME CANTABILE! HAHAHA. Wanted to watch the movie yesterday night on its opening day but I couldn't 'cos I had to prepare for my interviews today so I'm gonna watch it tomorrow instead. Yay! Can't wait. I need happy stuff. Loads and loads of happy stuff. I know the ending for part 1 of the movie will be quite sad...but whatever. I WANT TO WATCH A MOVIE!

Read the news on Jack Neo's dramatic press conference. I don't know what to say of Jack's wife, Irene. I feel for her, truly, but the way she is reacting to her husband's philandering ways is really a huge turn-off. I read this section from zaobao about her views on her husband after this whole string of affair. She actually called her hubby her 5th baby (she has 4 children) because of his need for her after his disgraceful deeds were exposed to the public. HONESTLY? YOUR HUBBY CHEATED ON YOU WITH WHO KNOWS HOW MANY WOMEN AND YOU STILL PAMPER HIM LIKE HE HASN'T DONE ANYTHING WRONG?! I don't know man. I don't understand at all. There is a time to be mushy and all but this is nuts! By her actions, isn't she openly condoning his ways? Encouraging him to continue with his illicit acts because she has shown that she is "big-hearted" enough to share his man with other women ("it doesn't matter as long as I love him")??? She even stated that it is normal for married men to have affairs. Eh. As a woman, I really do not agree with her on this. I'm sure her heart's broken into a million pieces. My mum's theory is that she probably needs Jack because he provides for her (materially) so she has no choice. According to mum, Irene worked as a a sales girl (I'm assuming she didn't receive a high education). In fact, I don't think she worked after she married Jack so she doesn't have to ability/ skill to be financially independent and provide for 4 kids if she gets a divorce now. She's probably sticking around because of her kids as well.

How she tolerated this shit from her husband for so long, I have no idea. She knew about the affair like 1 year ago and didn't do anything about it?! Of 'cos I feel very sad for her and she has demonstrated a lot of strength in this whole episode so far; but the whole baby, mushy thing is overkill. A woman must have some dignity right? She can forgive her husband but she cannot overlook her husband's wrongs! She is sending a very wrong message to her kids and the next generation.

Sorry, a bit worked up. Sigh. I'm sure there are so many poor women out there who have been through similar shitty situations. Poops. Are there any good men left? Is it possible for men to even stay faithful??? Yes, I believe so. I'm such an optimist, I know (haha)...but I'm sure there are still a few good men around. To be fair, we have to understand that it's very challenging for guys also lah. There are so many temptations all over the place. Traps everywhere! There is a bible verse that warns about falling trap to such temptations right. Got no time to search for it now. Maybe later!

I'm gonna prepare to go out for dinner liao. BYe bye~