Restless

I feel super sian now. Honestly, I am a little sad at work because of the many many changes. The workplace is made of its people right? And all (many) the people are leaving...so I'm sad. Of course I understand that this is how it is in the workplace and that when shit happens, no one is going to defend you. I get it all. It became all the more apparent on Friday when I boo boo-ed at work. I didn't phrase my words as clearly as I should in an email and it caused some misunderstanding. My colleague, as nice as she is, didn't want to get involved...which is understandable 'cos I wouldn't either, if I were in her shoes. This is just how it is. It does get a little depressing lah. Who likes to screw up at work, have all their colleagues leave, and do OT till late? It's sad. I feel very sian and thoughts of quitting came into my head. The work itself is ok lah, it's just the timing I entered was not so opportune. However quitting now is an act of a weakling. I know there are colleagues who can't wait to leave because of the lack of permanent headcount (basically to consider about own future) and the current depressing atmosphere at work. I suppose I can quit with some of my own reasons too but giving up now would be quite irresponsible. I'm only 1 month into the job. LOL. I haven't accomplished what I intended to achieve with this job. So yeah, even tho' I feel quite crappy about my work situation now...I'll stick at it. I don't want to but I will anyway. I AM NOT SOFT LIKE WHAT MY CELL-LEADER SAYS! Gotta fight for the reputation of people my generation. We've never really suffered hardship before but that doesn't mean we will give up immediately when the going gets tough! So yeah, friends, if you're struggling at work, it's ok! We suffer and we grow!

To see this on a brighter side, this situation offers a good opportunity for me to grow- build working experience. Shuting is absolutely right. We can afford to ask and learn now 'cos we are still considered young (and inexperienced). That liberty and privilege to ask diminishes as we age 'cos as we grow older, we are EXPECTED to know more. By then, we can't ask lame questions anymore without our colleagues or bosses shooting us dirty looks. Haha.

Oh. I think the computer at work is very slow. Cannot tahan. Yesterday it jammed on me after it auto-locked at 8PM. I tried to unlock my screen but my keyboard was non-responsive. Luckily the IT helpdesk dude could remotely access my system and allow me to save my files. Heng ah! My computer mouse is quite crappy 'cos it doesn't have a click wheel. It's the touch kind, which doesn't give me as much control as a click wheel does. Something it scrolls too quickly, other times, too slowly but the worse times are when it scrolls on its own. Horrors. I also discovered that I need a requisition submitted to my HOD to purchase a new one. Like hello, it's just a mouse. I can't even exchange for a more normal mouse? Of well. Maybe I'll just have to make do with the mouse lor. I don't know lah. Don't care also. The mouse is the least of my worries now. Haha.

Hope to get a new laptop soon. Gosh...Mac or Windows? I am still deciding. Mac is expensive lor but the boot-up time is much shorter. Windows' slow boot-up is really annoying me. Ahhh. I just need a system that allows me to watch HD videos without lag. Don't really have the cash now but I'm keeping a look-out. Have to save up! The new Macbook pro is out but it's SO EXPENSIVE. The 13 inch one has the same specs as the previous model I think. Has anything changed? I dunno. A Core 2 Duo should be sufficient for me.

Eita and Juri's drama! I watched the subbed version yesterday. The ratings kinda suck. 11.8%, which is horrendously low for people of their acting calibre. Personally I don't find the script very impressive. The storyline is too similar with Last Friends' and I don't care much for the characters. Juri's acting is a little too Nodame-ish also. I really hope she gets out of Nodame mode once and for all. She honestly needs to work on a lot of aspects for her Taiga drama. The way she speaks, the tone she uses, the way she walks, etc. I'm quite worried for her now man. It's the prestigious TAIGA DRAMA! If she screws up as the lead...that's it. She loses all credibility as an actress who can draw viewers.

I'm going to watch S.H.E's concert tonight! HAHAHAH. Yeah man! S.H.E! HAHAHa. I hope the concert will be good. I'm just going to unwind.